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  • Writer's pictureCarlos Luis

Understanding & Fighting Depression

Have you found yourself sad, sulky, upset and angry? This kind of mood disorder could be defined as depression. But depression is a common illness with many other symptoms which we all must comprehend. The first step to addressing depression is being aware of it and accepting the fact that something is wrong with us. There is always a ray of hope to all our problems only we have to look out for options in the universe. The pandemic has left us all in a fix for sure. Amidst trying to find a normal we undoubtedly feel lost and depressed. But aren’t we all in the same boat? Why not handle these bouts of negativity together?

Sushant Singh Rajput a film star and dancer committed suicide on 14th June 2020. Many other successful people like him have gone through depression. Deepika Padukone who has been vocal about it stands as a great example that depression is not a taboo. After the sad news of Sushant, many on twitter commented that he should have spoken to someone. He should have expressed his heart etc. But is it easy to do so when you are going through such disgusting times? It isn’t. Sushant needed someone of his own perhaps to be just there beside him to make him know that he is loved. Many of us may feel no one loves us, but if we think about it, there are people around us who care for us. Who loves us dearly. Only thing is they aren’t able to inquire every single day about our well-being. That’s why it is so important to socialize or celebrate life once a while.

During this pandemic, we have lost many of our farmers and migrants who took this tragic step of giving up on life. If only we would have reached out to them at an opportune time. But who knows what would be the opportune time? How would I as a charitable person know someone badly needs me, unless and until someone asks for help? Or how would a person desperately in need communicate to someone his or her desires? These are questions that disturb and leave us hopeless.

I strongly believe that we need to address our innermost working of the heart and that which conspires in our mind. If I feel upset and lonely, I ought to take the first step to realize that fact and accept it. As soon as I have accepted this reality, it is best to express it to someone dear to us. Friends are the best people to whom we can share our hearts out. I have found great relief sharing my ups and downs with my friends and they have willingly offered to stand beside me to support me. Parents are the people who will never leave us alone but at times you do not feel comfortable to share with them. Expressing to our teachers, relatives, religious leaders who are dear to us could also work miracles in our lives.

Our hearts are troubled a majority of times and we feel that we can handle everything that comes our way without anyone’s assistance. That may be true but may not be the case always; we need a listening ear and an expressive heart. I can handle a situation if I am emotionally confident. If I am not, I need someone to spot me. So I become my only healer. I am the reason for my happiness although the people around me can be a share in my happiness and that happiness can have a rippling effect.

Being on the other side is also difficult. We are not always able to notify what the other is going through. It is hard to guess and imagine. It is difficult to feel what the other feels as the degree differs. Many a time we might be told by people to whom we become pillars of assistance that, “you will not understand what I am going through.” Very fair, neither of us can understand nor feel what the other goes through, our experiences are different and we are all unique personalities. But when one says, “I can understand what you are going through.” It means that one is ready and willing to listen. That one is prepared to let go of one’s inhibitions and give it a try to be your friend. The very effort of being a companion to the other means that one cares and that is a superb start.

If we have been companions and compatriots then half the battle against depression is already won. What we ought to do later is to build our self-esteem; feel good about ourselves and a little bit of extra self-love. Sharing that love I have for myself with and for my neighbour could be a notch higher. Sharing doubles love. And then there is no stopping to life. Life is beautiful subsequently. In reality with life’s frivolous hullaballoo that comes our way, remember we are social beings and we need each other. Let’s, therefore, promise to one another #IAMWITHYOU.

Copyright ©2020 The Goan Everyday newspaper.

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